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Five Reasons Why You’re Not an Elite Road Warrior Yet But How to Become One

Nothing like offending the reader right out of the gate by telling you You’re NOT an elite road warrior yet.

It reminds me of my favorite highly educational and cerebral movie (ha ha), Dumb and Dumber where Jim Carrey is talking to the love of his life and asking her what were his chances with her.

Mary Swanson : I’d say more like one out of a million.

Lloyd Christmas : [long pause while he processes what he’s heard] So you’re telling me there’s a chance.

So, I’m definitely telling you there’s a chance and I want you to have the optimism and commitment of Lloyd Christmas in Dumb and Dumber.

I love the word ELITE.

You hear it in the sports world.

You hear it in the business world.

But until now, we’ve not heard it associated in business travel and with the Road Warrior.

My Definition of an Elite Road Warrior

Does what it takes, no matter what, to be at your best in your work / health / home life while on business travel.

So, with that lofty aspiration, there are …

Top Five Reasons Why You’re NOT an Elite Road Warrior Yet…

(with the emphasis on the word YET)

1. We hate to miss out on anything

It’s easy on the road to get pulled in / sucked in / pressured in / easily persuaded into about everything

  • Food – appetizers / fattening food / desserts
  • Drinks – soda / energy drinks / alcohol
  • Events
  • After Parties

It’s FOMO – fear of missing out and that’s exactly the issue. The problem though is we simply prefer instant gratification. The benefit of the here and now and we can easily justify it.

2. We’re just too busy and too tired

As a result of hating to miss out on anything, we become incredibly busy and always on the go. When that happens, we’re just too tired.

Too busy and too tired to do the habits that will ultimately allow us to become an elite road warrior.

3. We’re too set in our ways

If you’ve been on the road for any length of time, you have YOUR WAY of doing things on the road.

We just do our deal. I call it our Road Thing. We do whatever the day on the road tells us to do.

Change is hard in general, and then when you combine the road being hard, it’s just easy to get set in your way of doing things.

But if “your ways” are not producing great results and leading you to becoming who you want to be, then it’s a problem.

4. We don’t have a plan

We may have a plan for our trip:

  • our travel schedule
  • our meetings
  • dinners or events

But we don’t have a plan for the habits that are going to move the needle on moving from the Exhausted Road Warrior or the Existing Road Warrior to the Elite Road Warrior.

Our lack of plan becomes our plan and how’s THAT working out for you?

5. We didn’t know it was possible

Too often we just do our Road Thing because it’s the only thing we know.

When we’re unaware of a “better way” we just do what we’re comfortable with and used to. It’s easy and natural.

But when you hear of a better way, does that peak your interest? If so, you don’t have to be stuck just existing or exhausted on the road.

Whether you realize it or not, you have a certain energy level that you’ve developed on the road.

Is your status as good as you think it is or even hope it to be?

If you’re reading this blog, there’s a good chance you want to improve your road life.

Maybe you’re one or more of the following:

  • In the worst shape of your life right now
  • Stressed and overwhelmed
  • Always tired or even exhausted when you come back home
  • Disconnected with those back home far more than you want to be

You don’t have to stay the way you are on the road. You can change. You can stop limiting the road and what it can’t do for you and begin to leverage the road for what it can do for you.

So, How do you become an ERW (Elite Road Warrior)?

1. Committing to the three focus areas of an ERW:

Let’s circle back to my Definition of an Elite Road Warrior: Does what it takes, no matter what, to be at their best in their work / health / home life while on business travel.

Too many business travelers are average at best in just one or two of those areas. It may be Work and that’s it. Or Work and kinda your health or work and your home life is okay but you’re not connected at a deep level if you even know what is possible.

I came to a point where I just “had enough.”

  • Tired of how I look in the hotel mirror
  • Tired of not performing at a level I knew I could do on the road
  • Tired of no energy
  • Tired of feeling distant from my family

I needed to change and the commitment was to the three focus areas of an Elite Road Warrior:

  • Work
  • Health
  • Home Life

2. Developing the 6 Energy Habits 

This is how you become an ERW – by integrating the six energy habits into your Road Life.

Here are the six. Three are Physical Energy Habits and Three are Mental Energy Habits:

The Physical Energy Habits:

1.Move

2. Fuel

3. Rest

The Mental Energy Habits:

4. Perform

5. Develop

6. Connect

The way they integrate with the Three Focus Areas:
Work – Perform / Develop
Health – Move / Fuel / Rest
Home Life – Connect

And these 6 Energy Habits are the basis for my upcoming book called Elite Road Warrior – Transform Your Work, Health, and Home Life on Business Travel.

You may feel like you’re close or possibly a LONG way away right now from being an ERW.

Either way, my book, podcast, and this blog are all designed to move you to implement 6 Energy Habits within the three key focus areas of Work / Health / Home Life.

We can do this together.

How I Shocked My Wife with the Not Forgotten Journal

How I Shocked My Wife with the Not Forgotten Journal

One of the hardest things about the road for me personally is the loss of time and connection with the love of life, my wife Susan.

We enjoy being around each other – from playing sports to going for a walk and just talking and laughing.

The road steals that from us and cannot ever give it back.

It’s a reality she’s accepted through the years but it didn’t come easy. My contact with her on the road was as absent as my presence. I was lousy at it for a long time. I’m just being vulnerable here.

In my role as a business travel performance expert, I hear the good, the bad, the ugly, and the brutal unfiltered truth.

Too many men have wrecked their marriages and heck, most of their relationships as a result of the road.

Too many women are not only burned out by the road, but also by additionally taking care of home life back home before they leave, while they’re gone, and picking up any collateral damage when coming home.

I have nothing but the highest respect for traveling mothers – truly unsung heroes.

I’ve had my share of senseless and needless fights before leaving. In my interview with Megan Bearce in my podcast episode #024 she says “it’s easier to leave mad than sad.”

My biggest blowout came not from an argument, but by a hurtful thing I did, or in this case, did NOT do coming home from a trip.

Here’s the backstory for context…

I was coming off a brutal stretch including international travel and back-to-back trade shows where I was up early for C-suite breakfast meetings and had late evenings for corporate parties and customer dinners. My wife and I were basically competing by text who was more tired. She was raising my kids as a single mom in my absence, which remember, was a brutal stretch.

When I came around the corner and pulled into my driveway, I only saw my wife’s arms and my youngest child at the time as a one-year-old as the “Running Man Baby.”

I’d like to say that I grabbed my baby,  kissed my wife, embraced my kids,  and gave my wife the night off for me to clean the house and take care of the kids.

But what I did… walked right by my beautiful and exhausted wife, heard my kids say “Daddy’s home!” and all I said was an agitated, “Daddy’s tired,” and went to lay down on the couch in the family room. Who does that? I woke up to a beautifully angry wife who had tears in her eyes and let me know with a soft, strong tone: “Something needs to change.”

I realized I had become a Check-In Guy. My family always had to adjust to my exhaustion and my check-in schedule when I was on the road. I had become “That Guy” I swore I’d never become as a husband, father, and even friend. This became my “Wake-up Call” that didn’t come from a hotel but a call that was the result of my unawareness and selfishness.

I still had a choice – I could heed the call or ignore the call.

Too many business travelers not only ignore the call, they minimize the call, justify their actions with the call and go on to do their business (travel that is) as usual.

I knew I needed to change and it was the start of the Six Energy Habit – Connect.

This change didn’t happen overnight – or over one business trip, but a series of months.

It took what I learned as the three elements of Connect:
1. Connect Intentionally – on purpose
2. Connect Thoughtfully – reflective
3. Connect Creatively – memorable

To be honest, I found it easier to begin to do some creative things for my kids – I have a creative side so this was an easy and quick win for me. But I had a ton of ground to make up for with my wife and just didn’t know what to do that could “Move the Relational Needle” with the amount of neglect I had done.

I had created so much distance while I was gone, and then so much tension when I came home – I had such high and unrealistic expectations on the house being clean, everyone adjusting their schedule to dad’s exhaustion or work that still needed to be done. Instead of helping I was criticizing and critiquing – this is coming from the guy who was gone most of the week to a functioning single mom when I was gone.

Can you see the pain that I caused?

I desperately needed to find something meaningful for my wife – something that showed her that she was not forgotten while I was on the road – that I thought of, loved, missed, needed, and deeply appreciated her.

One day for one of my road downtime activities, I was in a Barnes-n-Noble looking at books, and I noticed the Journal section. In my curiosity, I saw one that was really cool and thought I’d get it and figure out what to do with it at some point.

I knew I could use it for my wife in some intentional, thoughtful, and creative way. I was on a flight doing what I call Think Space, dedicated time to process my thoughts. I decided I would figure out a way to utilize this beautiful journal.

Then it hit me – what if I wrote something, anything in this journal every day I was on the road to let her know she was not forgotten.

And there the idea for the  NFJ (Not Forgotten Journal) was born.

What I did:

  1. Reserved a couple of minutes every day on the road to write in the journal
  2. Planned ahead – I used Think Space for ideas on what to write
  3. Chose one of the following to write about:
  • Memory – funny / serious – song, scent, location, picture, food
  • Encouragement
  • Inspiration
  • Appreciation
  • Feeling – missing home, lonely

Full Disclosure – the journal I chose had a TON of pages in it which felt like it was never going to end

The response – I finished it on June 21st and gave it to my wife the very next day.

Lessons Learned

  1. You don’t have to wait until you blow it. You should do something now
  2. It was harder and easier than I thought – harder because I put a lot of pressure on myself and it was a super big journal, and easier because it only took a couple of minutes per road day
  3. When I couldn’t think of what to say/write, I looked at a picture of my wife and asked myself “what would she need to hear from me?
  4. Having ideas to stimulate the creativity was huge – I needed the primer for the days I was in a hurry or just not feeling creative
  5. This was not about me – so when I didn’t feel like it, I had to remind myself “this is for her, not me, and I cannot wait for her to read this page.”

Suggested Next Steps

  1. Experiment with the NFJ concept – what would this look like for you to apply and work in your situation
  2. Buy a NFJ journal
  3. Keep it a secret – take the pressure off of yourself

 

This isn’t going to be a quick win overnight. But I challenge you to consider upping your connect game on the road and giving the NFJ a real shot.

Hopefully hearing the NFJ story between me and my wife inspired you.

You can do this too!

So, wherever you are, do something, anything, just not nothing to master the business travel life.

 

10 Most Often Asked Questions Asked of Me About Road Life

One of my favorite parts of being a business travel performance expert is receiving so many questions whether through surveys, assessment, research projects, emails, or just plain conversation on a flight or at a hotel bar.

Recently, I spoke at a consulting firm and was flooded with GREAT questions from high-performing road warrior consultants who wanted to not get by on the road but get better and leverage the road to do it.

As a result, I’ve chosen ten of the most often asked questions for this article.

10 Most Often Asked Questions Asked of Me About Road Life

This 1st question is by far the most asked question but it’s also the one that gets the most pushback.

1 – How do you eat healthy on the road?

I failed miserably at this for easily the first half of my road career which has been too many years.

I viewed my business trip as a vacation when I ate, not a vocation. My filter was, “oh, that looks good!” I could spend more on an appetizer or dessert or glass of wine than I would on my entire meal with my own money.

The result? Ballooning to over 40 pounds overweight due to business travel. I hated how I looked in that blasted hotel mirror and felt lousy.

Then I came to the point where my perspective on food changed. I wanted energy on the road to be my best and Food is Fuel and Fuel is Energy.

I embraced four letters – MTHC (Make the Healthiest Choice)

And part of MTHC is three parts:
1. Continually Hydrate – I have an Elite Road Warrior water bottle and drink a ton of water ALL DAY LONG
2. Clean and Green – every meal is the cleanest I can eat and I add as many greens as I can
3. Carry a Controlled Substance – I carry a snack bag with Tupperware that has healthy snacks so I’m never caught off guard and always have an energy kick available

I have choices of what I put in my mouth and need to consciously choose how I feel after whatever I’m about to eat.

I favor hotels with full kitchens, shop at Whole Foods and/or Trader Joes whenever possible, and request eating someplace “Clean and Green” when going out with others.

I recently even did hard-core Keto30 on the road which you can listen to on episode 25 of the podcast.

Key phrase: MTHC (Make the Healthiest Choice)

2 – How do you workout on the road?

Time is your biggest enemy on the road.

I believed the lie “if I can’t get in a full workout, what’s the point?” – Lies, nothing but lies!

I had to change my mindset to “Something, Anything is Better Than Nothing.”

Sometimes my 20-minute workout is better than an hour.

Sometimes, going 10 minutes hard in my hotel room with bodyweight and resistance bands is more than enough.

“But I’m too tired to workout” – lies, nothing but lies.

Movement creates energy.

How many times have you worked out in the morning after dragging yourself out of bed and by the end of the workout, you were ready to conquer your day?! That’s me – every… single… time.

I learned the Increase M4X Formula
1. Stand More – think up on your feet, not down on your butt
2. Walk More – think forward, not still
3. Run More – think cardio, get your heart rate up
4. Lift More – think strength training

How I…

  • Stand More – stand at the gate / every 30 min on a flight / in meetings whenever possible / create stand up desks at the hotel (lobby or room)
  • Walk More – park at the back of a parking lot / choose a higher floor at the hotel / take the stairs instead of the elevator or escalator or walk the escalator
  • Run More – do HIIT that gets my heart rate up – jog to run / burpees / stairs quickly
  • Lift More – bodyweight / dumbbells / resistance bands

Key phrase: Something, Anything is Better Than Nothing

3 – How do you get a better night of sleep on the road?

Ah, sleep, the ultimate waste of time on the road, right? How can you get anything done if you’re in a coma?

I used to view sleep as a “necessary evil”

I had to learn to make the sleep I was getting, which was 6 hours or less, better before I started to add any more sleep because it wouldn’t be quality sleep.

1. Prioritize Bed Time
2. Create a Bed Time Ritual
3. Create an Ideal Sleep Environment

For me…

Bed Time Priority always depended on the type of my trip – was I by myself or with others? Was I doing training, speaking, and workshops, or at a conference or trade show? Once I knew, then I could realistically prioritize bedtime. That may mean leaving the event or bar earlier but nobody really cared the next morning. Regardless, getting to bed with the foresight of what time I needed to get up was a priority.

My Bed Time Ritual:

  • Drop the Lights
  • Drop the Temperature
  • Change the Room Scent
  • Comfy Clothes – under armor shorts / Hurley soft t-shirt or Dep Sleepwear
  • Read
  • Guided Meditation

Ideal Sleep Environment:

  • Cool
  • Dark and I mean dark – towel over door crack/clip to keep the curtains shut
  • Bose Sleep Buds

Key Phrase –“Improve Before Increase”

 

4 – What is your morning routine?

It has definitely evolved over time. In fact, I have an entire podcast episode on the First Hour of Your Road Day called the Energy Hour

My routine used to be checking social media, sports scores, texts, and emails while still in bed!

Once I opened up any of those, they owned my day and I rarely turned it around.

So, I needed to make sure I took care of ME first before everyone else’s agenda.

And what took care of me?

Four of the six energy habits:

1. Develop
2. Move
3. Connect
4. Fuel – continually hydrate

My exact morning routine:

  • Hydrate – my drink
  • Develop – read my Bible / read something inspirational / pray and meditate
  • Move – workout
  • Connect with the Fam – I want them to hear from me first thing in the morning and I’ll talk about how in Q5

Key Phrase – “Hit the Four Before the Door”

5 – How do you stay connected with those you love back home?

This was an area where I was what you call, a Check-In Guy for WAY too long.

I just “checked in” when it was convenient for me with no regard to what was going on back home in the life of my wife and kids. It was selfish to be honest as I look back on it.

Staying connected, especially if you’ve been traveling for any length of time, can, well, get old and stale. And for me, I wasn’t checking in enough and it really affected my family and friends back home.

Eventually, I leveraged my creative side to “spice things up” to re-connect with everyone to become a Connect-In Guy.

It’s done in three ways:

  • Connect Intentionally
  • Connect Thoughtfully
  • Connect Creatively – be memorable

How I Connect Now:

Key Phrase -“Be a Connect-In Guy or Girl, not a Check-in Guy or Girl”

The next five questions are more vulnerable.

I’ve not arrived as you’ll hear in the following answers. But I truly desire to transform my work, health, and home life on the road to master the business travel life.

 

6 – What took you the longest to change and why?

Learning how to rest and pace myself on the road. I’ve always been a hard-driver, Type-A, energy guy.

If you’ve not heard my back story, which you can listen to on the podcast in episode 002, I went so hard for so long, my body shut down to the point of complete exhaustion and I became very, very sick. It took months and months to recover and I had to learn to change my ways if I was going back to Road Life.

I had to prioritize three areas:

  • Sleep – improve then increase
  • Breaks – move the body, rest the mind
  • Downtime – time to be, not to be on

There was time for breaks and downtime – I just needed to take them and make them a priority – the payoff was beyond worth it.

I also had to learn to ask:

  • When is my energy the highest each day on the road?
  • Why is my energy low right now?
  • Is there anything I can do to change my energy level?
  • Can I match my energy with my tasks?

I had to become what I call an Energyologist (a Buckleyism) – the personal study of your own energy

Key Takeaway – You can have more energy on the road

 

7 – What do you regret the most on the road?

The answer is found in Energy Habit Six – Connect.

I regret not making my family a bigger priority especially when I first started traveling. I created some very bad habits in three areas:

  • How I left – abrupt and not sensitive especially to my kids’ feelings
  • When I was gone – When and how I contacted anyone back home revolved only around me and my schedule
  • How I returned – I was always exhausted when I came home and it was always about me. I demanded the house be in perfect condition and life revolved around me. I wanted to be left alone to “transition back into civilian life” yet I was angry when everyone went on with their lives.

My family hung in there but I had done some damage that took years to repair and I regret it. Thankfully I was able to turn it around and it’s become one of my strengths.

Learn from my costly mistakes.

Key Takeaway – Prioritize Others Just as Much

 

8 – What do I still struggle with on the road?

Drinking too often and too much.

I don’t get drunk on the road or take it too far. I learned very early in my career to never “be that guy” but only see or hear about “that guy”.

I love good wine and craft beer but have learned to minimize it big time especially doing Keto on the road.

I’m a Vodka Tonic guy and too easily justify a drink or three (always a double) after a long day, customer dinner, or event.

Doing Keto30 of absolutely no drinking was a very good thing for me along with not drinking on any weeknights when I’m home.

This is a struggle and growth area for me.

My biggest change has been adding one glass of water with every alcoholic drink. I call it the 1:1 Water Match Program – and it’s absolutely free to join

Key Takeaway – Make Sure You’re In Control

 

9 – How do you handle it when you blow it on the road?

I’ve adopted the James Clear concept called “Avoid the 2nd Mistake” – If I have a bad meal, I don’t justify the day or even the rest of the business trip.

If I don’t work out the 1st day, it’s not a free pass for the rest of the trip.

If you watch baseball, the best closers have the essence of short-term memory. If they blow last night’s game, they need to come back out the next night like it never happened and “begin again.”

Depending on what “blowing it” was for me, in the early days there was some regret and guilt. I had a couple of close friends I could tell “the real story” for some confession and accountability. I wanted to monitor the heart.

Another phrase I use that is helpful to me is “Dip NOT Dive” – when I go “off-road” as I call it from the 6 Energy Habits, I need this to be a quick dip and get right back to what allows me to master the business travel life and avoid the downward spiral and the 2nd mistake.

Learn from it and move on.

Key Takeaway – Avoid the 2nd Mistake

 

10- What advice would you give for a newer business traveler?

  • Learn and apply the Six Energy Habits immediately in your Road Career.
  • If you have bad habits at home, road life will only expose them.
  • Don’t worry about “what everyone else does or says”, you take care of yourself first and foremost.

Learn from my mistakes and others. You don’t have to do it the hard way with a brutal crashing and burning, 40 pounds overweight, burned out, stressed out, and disconnected from family and friends.

Key Takeaway – Own the Six Energy Habits right now!

 

I hope these questions and answers were helpful. They’ve been asked by a number of people, so here it was:
* The good
* The bad
* The ugly

I hope you gained some ideas and appreciated my honesty with the goal of helping you become an Elite Road Warrior.

If you want any more detail or further examples, you can find them in my book, ERW – 6EH to Master the Business Travel Life. It’s available on Amazon in the print version, Kindle digital version, and also on audiobook via Audible.

So, wherever you are on the road, do something, anything, just not nothing to master the business travel life. You Got This!

Five Lies About Business Travel

Business travel has many misconceptions. Someone who lives in the 9-to-5 office world truly does not understand our world. At all.

They have the essence of routine, consistency, and predictable-ness. Every single day.

Almost the exact opposite of a business traveler. And we like it that way.

Then there are family and friends who think we’re continually on vacation and we “have the life.”

Although they may think this is the case, whether we realize it or not, there are realities about business travel that are just not true.

Two specific groups of people within our inner circle of business travel, need to know the truth:

  1. Future business travelers – whether you’re in a company that is grooming you to travel or you want to switch jobs or even careers to begin to travel for work
  2. Leaders of business travelers – those that oversee and influence the work life of a road warrior

Why these two specific groups?

It’s because perception becomes reality and truth oftentimes just must be shared to expose the lie.

I’ve uncovered five specific lies I want to expose especially for future business travelers and those who lead business travelers. Each lie will also have a pushback, the truth, and an elite tip.

Five Lies About Business Travel

Lie #1 – Business Travel is a luxurious life

This is the one I hear all the time from friends and family. When someone meets me for the 1st time or hasn’t seen me in a while, they usually ask about all my “cool adventures.” Aka: tell me about your luxurious work life.

Here’s the Pushback – When someone hears you travel for work, they think or even say, “That’s awesome. You get to fly to cool cities, stay in really nice hotels, eat out at restaurants all the time, and get served. And you’re by yourself. That’s the life! I would do anything for your life.”

Does business travel offer some great perks? Of course. But like anything, too much of a good thing, or anything for that matter, grows old and loses its luster. The same is true with business travel. Just ask a road warrior who’s been at it for a while.

We’re not going on a vacation with a stress-free flight to an exotic place. We’re going to work, man. I’m in a suit, not shorts and flip-flops.

Hotels begin to look the same. The food begins to taste the same.

The outsider, whether an office-only co-worker or friends/family just doesn’t see what we know as “traveler friction” – delayed flights, canceled meetings, endless traffic, late nights with people we don’t really like. And on and on and on.

Truth: Business travel is a vocation not a vacation with different expectations and needed results.

Elite Tip: Find something to look forward to “doing or seeing” on every single trip:

  • Go to a ballgame
  • Visit a cool site in the city
  • Eat at a local favorite restaurant

In Elite Road Warrior lingo, we call this Downtime – time to be, not to be on. You need downtime to allow yourself to unwind so you can perform at your best. If I’m by the ocean, I always see a sunset. If I’m in a town I’ve never visited, I always see the sites. If they have a sports team, I must see a game. If they’re known for a certain style of food, I find that premier restaurant. You get the point.

Business travel is not a luxurious life but it doesn’t have to be a boring life either and if we play it right, the road can bring us the energy to perform at an elite level.

Lie #2 – It’s hard to eat healthy on the road

At first, this lie is very easy to believe.

For too many years, I believed, supported, and defended this lie. I flew by the Travel 20 to the Entitled 40… pounds that is, when in reality, I simply had no food boundaries and literally had the weight to prove it. I didn’t pass up on any of the king’s food or miss any of the king’s wine. So, of course, I said it was hard to eat healthy on the road.

Here’s the Pushback – Many of my meals I don’t actually choose the food (meaning the client provides lunch or chooses the dinner location).

This is a generalization and, again, I get it since it used to be me. It’s true, this happens, but sometimes, most of the time I have choices. And even if the client provides the lunch or chooses the dinner location, there are still healthier options.

Truth: Eating healthy is a proactive decision, not a reactive determination.

You can influence the client far more than you realize. Often, they’re uncertain what to choose in the first place. I’m often very clear that I eat on the healthier side. And I never let them determine “what is healthy for me.” I’ll give them examples of a grilled chicken dark green salad for lunch or steak or seafood with veggies for dinner.

I also realize there are often limited options at the airport. I get that but don’t rely on the airport for your nutrition.

Elite Tip: Do your intel at an airport. For example, as I’m walking out of the airport from the gate after landing, I’m looking around at all my food options but not for right now. But for when? My return flight home so I know if I can eat at this airport or I need to prepare in advance to eat somewhere else.

Elite Road Warrior teaches four words that should be your guide on eating healthy on the road: Make the Healthiest Choice.

Not the easiest choice, or the quickest choice, or the largest choice, or the tastiest choice but make the healthiest choice. It can be done if eating healthy is a proactive decision, not a reactive determination.

 

Lie #3- I have no control of my time on the road

This lie is a sneaky one because we subtly learn to be reactive on business travel. We watch others. We see our co-workers, bosses, fellow road warriors.

We do things in the moment. We’re just not trained how to do Road Life.

Every company I’ve ever worked for did a good or great job training me on the product or service but when it came to how to do road life and how to manage my time and energy on the road, it happened only… NEVER!

The road is a completely different animal that is a developed, learned skill to know when and how to work in the margins so you’re not working all the time which leads to burnout and inconsistent results.

Here’s the Pushback – I’m not in charge of my schedule. You don’t know how many meetings I have or what’s required of me on every single trip. I work every second I can on the road.

I hear you on that one and have been “that guy” before for way too long.

Truth: You have far more control of your time and results than you realize.

Once I started taking personal responsibility for MY time and MY energy, everything began to change. I didn’t wait for my company to train and teach me because in my case, it never would’ve happened. In fact, this is the very reason I created the Elite Road Warrior Group! I want to train business travelers, like you, how to make the most of the road.

Elite Tip: Intentionally put up Road Blocks every day of your business trip. Huh? I thought Road Blocks were a bad thing. Not if you use them properly.

A Road Block is a barrier around something to get work done. In this context, you want as many Road Blocks on the road as you can get in your day!

You need to schedule blocks of time to focus on one specific task (email, phone calls, quotes, data entry, presentations, etc) for a set period of time so you can get consistent results.

When you schedule Road Blocks and focus, you’ll be amazed at how much you can get done in this set window of time and you’ll have more time than you think on the road. It’s the work smarter not harder principle.

Energy Habit Four is Perform and goes into a ton of detail about how to perform at an elite level. The book, Elite Road Warrior goes into far more detail so pick up the physical, digital, or audio version today.

Lie #4 – My family is not affected when I’m on the road

This lie gets personal quick and can easily get exposed by a handful of inquiry questions.

A few questions can expose just how any given road warrior views “life back home” while on the road.

Or to put it another way: “Says the man who leaves his wife or significant other to take care of everything back home including YOUR kids!”

Disclaimer: Women don’t fall for this lie at all in fact they actually feel the stress of home on the road worrying if things back home are going as planned.

For the rest of us, do you know who is really affected?

  • Your spouse who is left to take care of everything on their own
  • Your kids who now have to rely on just one parent

Here’s the Pushback – Well, they’ve never said anything or they don’t know anything different because I’ve always traveled.

Truth: Your family needs you to be present on the road just as you are at home but leverage the time in a different way.

Energy Habit Six is called Connect and it focuses on leveraging your time on the road to connect with those you love back home in intentional, thoughtful, and creative ways.

This means leveraging the road to continue to be present in ways you wouldn’t normally do at home and end up making an impact on them.

Even though I’m not physically there with my family, I can still be visually and audibly present.

There was a stretch that my travel was so heavy and it brought on so much stress with my wife and kids. It was brutal on my marriage and my relationship with my kids, especially the younger ones.

I finally heard my wife say “something’s gotta change” (words you never want to hear) and realized she had been giving me clues all along. I just wasn’t listening and noticing.

As a result, I vowed to “change my ways” but realized I need to be patient, purposeful and planned.

Elite Tip: three tangible “change my ways” products to help you stay connected with your family on the road…

  • Not Forgotten Journal – learning to take just two minutes to write something to my wife each day in a journal I would one day give to her
  • Flat Kiddos – colored characters that I take pictures of in my world
  • Connect Cards – creative cards made by kids for kids that I leave and send to my kids writing meaningful words

I challenge you to stop denying that your family is not affected and to make connecting a huge priority.

 

Lie #5 – There are no temptations with business travel

We’re all wired differently from our interests to our style to our preferences to our attractions.

For those who don’t travel and are put in a place where temptation can appear, they can easily assume and even judge that it would never happen to them.

Here’s the Pushback – I’ve handled being put in a tempting position before and would be strong again

But do you know what changes? Being potentially thousands of miles from home and nobody may ever know.

Episode 085 and the article from two weeks ago discusses the dark side of business travel because it’s real, scary, and dangerous. We discuss the five downward spiral choices into the dark side of business travel.

  • There are food temptations / drink temptations / sexual temptations on the road
  • We have endless opportunities to experiment that can lead to new road habits that can lead to hidden addictions
  • We can even be put into moral decisions we thought ever thought we would be put in and respond in ways we may regret the rest of our lives

Truth: You can have integrity on the road when you’re aware of the temptations and have boundaries.

Elite Tip: Two Powerful Words: Know Thyself

The phrase came from the teachings of Socrates and popularized by Plato. It was the first of three maxims inscribed in the forecourt of the Temple of Apollo at Delphi. The two maxims that followed “know thyself” were “nothing to excess” and “surety brings ruin”.

The 2nd phrase is applicable here too: nothing to excess.

Know Thyself means to recognize how human I really am and the right place meeting the right circumstances can take me down. So, let me get personal: I know I have an addictive personality. I’m a risk-taker and too easily push boundaries.

As a result, I MUST be very cautious on the road to not compromise my integrity, reputation, and family. I’m old enough to know the difference between short-term pleasure and long-term regret but must never believe the lie there are no temptations that can affect me on business travel.

Awareness on the road is key. My hope is this article was revealing, challenging, and a reminder of how easy we can fall into lies that can affect so many aspects of our road results and ultimately our lives.

Leverage….. to help you become and remain an Elite Road Warrior today to eliminate burnout and exceed results.

You Got This!

How One Creative Idea Connected Me With My Kids Back Home

You may have heard a little bit about my story and my family. The Buckley Kiddos (there are 5 of them) never chose to have their father as a business traveler, but it’s the hand they’ve been dealt with at least right now.

Early on, I didn’t put much thought into my contact with my family when I was on the road. Compared to everyone else, some business trips I did better than other trips and justified my contact because it was more than the average business traveler.

But when did I ever care about comparing myself to THAT GUY?! I came to a point where I felt the lack of engagement with my family especially with my kids because I was traveling so much.

I was uncovering my “WHY” I wanted to connect more back home.

The WHY gets me to do things when I don’t always feel like it, especially when I’ve had a busy and long day on the road.

I created the Flat Kiddos Concept. It’s a way for me to connect with my kids when I’m not at home. Take a look at them at the Elite Road Warrior website here.

 

One of my biggest challenges as a father on the road is staying connected with my kids in very intentional, thoughtful, and creative ways in general let alone on a consistent basis. I would take pictures of my locations, but it was more about “Dad’s cool hotel or rental car” and how they weren’t a part of my trip.

But then I asked myself, “what if I could theoretically take my kids with me in a creative way? You can now with Flat Kiddos. These are 9×6 inch characters that are on thick poster board for durability.
I had my kids color their own Flat Kiddo and now they can’t wait to see their picture on my next trip. This gives the opportunity for the Flat Kiddos to be seen in Dad’s World and how the kids are now involved.

Why I Use the Flat Kiddos Concept

The “why” is critically important and far more important than the “how”.

For far too long on the road, I was what I called a Check-In Guy. This guy “checked in” when it was convenient for me only.

I had a gift of calling at all the wrong times:

  • Dinner time
  • Bedtime
  • Kids at practice

I sent the occasional check-in update text.

I did FaceTime but was usually distracted. Sadly, one of my kids would call me out and say “Dad, you’re not paying attention.” Pathetic. I have just a few minutes to really connect with my family and I’m on email?

After a “come to Jesus” moment with my wife on how disconnected I was at home while on the road, I started looking for ways to leverage the road and what it can do for me instead of making excuses of the limits of the road and what I can’t do.

Remember, if you want to do something, you’ll find a way. If you don’t, you’ll find an excuse.

When I first started out I took pictures of the locations in my trip thinking my kids would want to see where Dad literally was in the world or my awesome meal or upgraded rental car.

At best I would get a COOL or LUCKY YOU response.

Often it was silence. Painful non-response.

Deserved.

I had that coming.

It came across in two ways:

  1. Dad’s bragging
  2. We’re not with him

But that wasn’t my motive and definitely not my heart.

I had an industry connection I had interviewed on another podcast called “The Energy Edge” Podcast, and listening to David Vasquez, had this little character called Peg Daddy that he traveled with and it hit me.

I revisited this concept with David Vasquez on episode 046 of the Elite Road Warrior.

But after that initial interview and the Flat Stanley story, I thought, what if I created Flat Stanley of my age-appropriate kids that traveled with me on the road?

For those of you who’ve not heard of the Flat Stanley story or concept, let me give you the 411:

Back Story – Stanley gets squashed flat by a falling bulletin board. Stanley’s parents rolled him up, put him in an envelope, and mailed him to his friend in California. We did the Flat Stanley project for my cousin’s kids from SoCal having Flat Stanley visit Chicago. Our kids loved it.

I had to figure this thing out.

Now, I had my WHY of wanting to connect and not just check in with my kids and I had this idea of doing something with Flat Stanley. Now what?

How I Use the Flat Kiddos Concept

I needed to begin to look through the eyes of my kids and what would be relatable to them in my road world.

I have five kids but not all are age-appropriate for Flat Kiddos.

For example, my high school sons prefer postcards from every location and it allows me to speak an encouraging word that I know they’ll read in this form.

Currently, I have two elementary-age kids and one four-year-old.

My 3rd and 5th graders are perfect for this age and my little guy is now ready for his Flat Kiddo too.

How Do You Make Your Flat Kiddos?

I’m often asked, how did you actually make the Flat Kiddos?

My two were basically an art project:

  • I went online and printed out a boy and girl Flat Stanley character
  • I cut out the characters
  • My wife glued them to strong poster-board
  • I had my kids color their own Flat Kiddos

It was simple but took some time and energy.

The favorite part was having my kids color their own Flat Kiddo and therein was the Buy-In.

Now, there are many road warriors who either aren’t creative or resourceful or just simply don’t have the time or won’t do it. Just recently I had a business traveler tell me: “Love the idea but this will never happen if it relies on me but I would buy them immediately. I can definitely tell my kids to color these for me.” You can buy them here.

So, you make or purchase your flat kiddo, you have your kids color them. Now what?

Here are Six Ideas for my Flat Kiddos

Airport

  • At the Gate or in the Terminal (up on the window with the plane in sight / checking the departure board/massage chairs)
  • On the Plane (in the seat / looking out the window)
  • With the Pilot or Flight Attendant

Hotel

  • Working at the desk
  • Watching TV
  • In the bathtub
  • On the toilet
  • On the bed
  • In the kitchen (since I stay at a lot of hotels with kitchens so I can prepare as many meals as possible)
  • Fitness Center – working out with the dumbbells/on the treadmill/bike
  • Pool catching some sun

Rental Car or RideShare

I’m in a rental car often because I fly into one city (for example, SD then drive to OC then to LA and fly out there or Tampa to Orlando to Fort Lauderdale) – I get some great upgrades and my kids love to see their Flat Kiddos in the driver seat

  • The driver seat of a cool rental car
  • Back seat watching an iPad
  • In the trunk!
  • Sitting next to me in an Uber or Lyft

Restaurant

I have my Flat Kiddos in my work bag so it’s easy to pull them out in a restaurant setting

  • Ordering food
  • A plate in front of them

Sight Seeing

  • The Alamo
  • Space Needle
  • Sunsets on the coast
  • In the mountains

The possibilities are endless – the key is just leveraging the city you’re in AND taking a few minutes for downtime – remember the definition? Time to Be, NOT to Be On and this is a great cause to take a little downtime.

People You Meet

People are often more than willing to join in a picture for such a cause – you just have to be willing and courageous to simply ask.

  • I mentioned Pilots earlier
  • Hotel front desk
  • Co-workers
  • When I speak, sometimes I’ll ask some people in the group to take a picture with my Flat Kiddos. I did that a few weeks ago speaking to 16 CEOs and these guys loved it!
  • One of my mentors from afar who I met, Michael

Get creative and ask for your kids

This is Possible Road Warriors…

Let me tell you about a quick story.

I met Barry in an airport before a flight when I was taking pictures of my Flat Kiddos in a couple of places near the gate. He asked what I was going but in a curious tone. So, I let him know WHY I do this and my desire to be a Connect-In Guy, not a Check-in Guy anymore on the road.

Barry paused then said, “If I were honest, I’m a Check-in Guy and this is a great idea that I can do to become a Connect-In Guy. Thanks for being an example and for giving me this inspiration.”

The key to being an elite road warrior is leveraging the road and what it CAN give to you if you let it.

I wouldn’t do Flat Kiddos at home obviously because I’m with my kids. But I can take a few minutes here and there to have them enter my Road Life through their Flat Kiddos.

You Got This!